Breaking Family Patterns of Abuse
- Details
- Written by Robert Wilkinson

At a FB astrology site, it was noted that the dysfunctional family temporarily desecrating the White House has a pattern of parental abuse being passed down generationally. What follows are some thoughts about how bound we are to the family matrix until we’re not.
While we idealize that our parents “should” be able to teach us all we need to be good people in life, navigating its ups and downs with clarity, confidence, and determination, in fact they were raised by parents with their blind spots, prejudices, and superstitions. If our parents were good people, to the degree they were able they taught us how to be “good” in their image. If our parents were dysfunctional, they modeled bad behavior. We all develop our belief systems by our interactions when young, and parents cannot teach what they do not know.
The family matrix gives us an incubator in which we grow, but through our interactions with others who have different beliefs and experiences, we find objectivity through the constantly changing third, fourth, and fifth views about any given belief. These contrasts with our family beliefs set up internal tension (and external, if they challenge the authority or assumptions of our parents!), which we hold until we repress it in our subconscious mind for further examination later in life, or resolve it in some way we can live with.
Again, parents cannot teach us what they do not know. Those who are unconscious of something cannot teach their children how to be conscious. Few if any of us were raised by saints or sages. This frees us to go our own way and do our own thing. That’s our eternal mandate as Spirits.
From my 50 years counseling people, it seems all of us had difficulties in childhood, suffering all types of abuse, both unconscious and conscious, mild and severe. Because of the nature of the family matrix we were raised in, we cannot look to our accepted family beliefs to break “the cycle of abuse” we experienced. As individuals, only we and we alone can break the cycle of abuse. There are many forms of abuse and they all have elements in common. There is a huge lexicon on this subject which explore what it is and how to learn skills to break the cycle.
Ultimately, it all comes down to personal choice and personal behavior. Only by becoming aware of our ability to choose responses outside the assumptions of our family and cultural matrix programming can we step beyond our "Ring Pass Not" and move in more helpful and positive directions of expanded awareness, I elaborate on this in my book Saturn: Spiritual Master, Spiritual Friend. This is common to us all, and part of human development.
We are never “doomed to repeat the past” unless we fail to see how we can change the pattern of response to that past karmic wave form. By examining the patterns in our lives, we can change the trajectory of our karma, and cease being troubled by echoes of memories of perceptions of someone else’s superstitions and wrong-headed behavior.
As we exercise our freedom to choose responses which make us clearer, stronger, more confident, and more connected with Self, others, and Source, we find we are not troubled by ancient echoes of memories of perceptions of illusions. We then have a less obstructed view of the moment, and begin to embrace our infinite potential to express our highest intention across the 12 areas of human experience.
© Copyright 2020 Robert Wilkinson - https://www.aquariuspapers.com
Reprinted on crystalwind.ca with persmission from Robert Wilkinson.
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