There are a number of traditions associates with the first of May.

Driving your cattle between two fires to protect them. Demanding workers’ rights. Gathering hawthorn flowers as an excuse to try and get in each other’s underwear. Dancing round a big pole that may or may not be a phallic emblem. May Queens. Jumping over fires.

Modern Paganism often associates this festival with love, passion and fertility. There’s a lot more going on and plenty to tap into if the amorous side doesn’t appeal to you. I’ve had very different experiences of this festival over the years and sometimes found it really difficult because of the sexy side.

We didn’t entirely plan it that way, but this is about the time that Keith and I started living together last year. For me it’s a happy association with the festival. It’s been a truly remarkable year, and even with the massive challenges we’ve faced, it has without a doubt been the happiest year of my life so far.

I’ve learned a lot about myself and about what I need to thrive. Over the year, we’ve learned a great deal about each other, and how to support and care for each other. We’ve built a life that is rich and joyful, and laid down a foundation for growing and flourishing together in the years to come.  This last year has taken me far beyond what I thought was possible.

I’m learning about love that is joyful, rather than laced through with pain. That’s made me less fearful, and so much happier. There’s such beauty in being able to embrace delight every day, and to be heart open, and feeling full rather than hollow. Love as something shared, and felt, rather than the experience of pouring from myself until I feel empty.

I’ve been writing about these experiences through the year. I’ve felt so much more investment in life, and so much soulful delight around everything that happens to me. There’s a new poetry collection on the way that explores this, and the experience of falling in love not only with a person, but with life itself.

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