About When To First Have Sex - Too Late, You're Already Doing It!
- Details
- Written by Neale Donald Walsch

My dear friends...
In all new relationships with romantic potential (and you all know exactly which ones those are) a single question looms large: When do we become sexual?
In order to answer that question we must ask a larger one: What IS sexuality, anyway?
If we do not understand what sexuality is, we will not understand when to express ourselves in a sexual way. So here is the truth about sexuality that nobody ever told you: You are always expressing yourself in a sexual way. There is no way not to be expressing yourself in a sexual way. LIFE is a sexual experience. Life IS sex.
Conversations with God tells us that "sex" is the word we use to describe the experience of Synergistic Energy eXchange. The only thing is, we have it in our minds that this kind of energy exchange is limited to contact with certain body parts, when in fact it describes our contact with everything.
Everything we do is sexual. Sex is the Energy of Life, and the exchange of that Energy is Life Itself, expressing. Life creates more life through the process of life itself. It is by the exchange of Its Own Energy that Life does this. The process that we call "photosynthesis" is the synthesis of chemical compounds with the aid of radiant energy, and especially light. It is how the sun makes plants grow. It is also how we make each other grow.
Never thought of it that way, eh...? Well, it is. Human beings grow, they become larger in soul, in spirit, and in their hearts and minds, when they experience love. And Love is "the synthesis of chemical compounds with the aid of radiant energy, especially light." When you send love to someone, you radiate energy. Literally. You radiate energy.
In fact, you radiate energy all the time, not just when you send someone love. The question is not whether you are radiating energy, but what kind of energy are you radiating? That is the only question in life that really matters. "What kind of energy am I radiating now---?" Whatever you radiate is reflected back to you. You receive what you send. What goes around, comes around.
Everyone else is continually radiating energy, too. Conversations with God calls this process Synergistic Energy eXchange. So, you are having S.E.X. all the time. The question is not whether you are having sex, but what kind of sex are you having?
I am not just playing with words here. I truly am not. This is the real answer to the question, "When should I start having sex in my new relationship?" It is important to understand that you are always "having sex" in your relationship -- and the way in which you do that will provide the answer to the questions you may have regarding the physical activities of your body.
For now, start your new relationships in a new way. Indeed, start every relationship in a new way. You can do this each day...for each day, every relationship is a new relationship. You are capable of recreating yourself anew in every golden moment of Now, and you are creating every relationship you have all over from the beginning each time you lay eyes on that other person. Did you know that? It does not have to be what it was yesterday. Nor do you have to be who you were yesterday.
Whether your present relationship is new or old, you can begin having good sex right now, today. Declare and decide that your Synergistic Energy eXchange with your Special Other will be filled with light and love, understanding and acceptable, compassion and forgiveness, celebration and joyous recognition. Joyously recognize, each time you speak to that person, the wonder and the glory of Who They Really Are. See Godliness in them each time you see them at all. Smile at the gift that they are to life. When they say, "What are you smiling at, you little cutie...?" just reply: "I'm smiling at the gift that you are. I'm feeling The Gift. And it's making me smile." Watch that change your day!
With Pure Love,
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