Today as I was opening my mailbox at the apartment complex mail center, I noticed that the mailman looked preoccupied, stressed.  He was not in a good mood.   He seemed overworked.  I have seen him that way many times.

I walked away from the mailboxes wanting him to think I too was uncomfortable in some way.  I didn’t want to appear too happy.

While I am not living a picture perfect life, more and more I am choosing to feel my joy in spite of my circumstances.

But I went right into ‘knee-jerk’ response when I thought someone was suffering.

I’ve done this so many times, and it’s something that has been so ingrained in me that until I became the observer of it from my higher perspective, it felt like normal behavior.

As I walked back to my apartment, I thought about how many times I have done that. How many times have we done that?  How many times have we diminished our light in order to make others feel comfortable.

This behavior just does not jive with our newly emerging consciousness.  Yet there is still a small part of us that wants to hang onto pain, because it’s been such a comfort zone for so long.  It’s what has kept us tethered to family, to friends, to school mates, co-workers, boyfriends, husbands, to community, to the rest of humanity.

Especially as women, we have been taking on the emotional and even physical burdens of others, and for all of humanity.

And that behavior has no place whatsoever in our expanding consciousness.

THE JOY FACTOR

If you look around at people, they are amazing.  They have good hearts.  It’s amazing how they can get through the day, considering there is really not much joy in their lives. Oh, they could be among the most privileged, the most wealthy, and the most healthy……..yet if you look into their eyes, the way they carry themselves, don’t they seem preoccupied?  How many are savoring the moments?  Do they look like they are truly feeling passionate about being here?

Doubtful.

And you really can’t blame them.  This environment isn’t really conducive to joy.  Oh, make no mistake, there is ample energy here to create joy with.  But the prevailing consciousness here on the planet is not really encouraging that state of joy.

It’s steeped in victim consciousness.  In struggle.  And pain.

INTRODUCING THE NEW CONSCIOUSNESS

So here we are, new consciousness pioneers, daring to do something different.  So different that even we doubt ourselves.

Each of us knows we have that deep joy within us, even if we can’t always access it.  We also know that it takes detaching from mass consciousness in order to sustain that joy.  It takes detaching from being intertwined with family, friends and even from our lineage, our ancestors.  And from our spiritual families.

A tall order for sure.  Because it brings up so much in us emotionally and physically.  It can feel so daunting, so frustrating, so boring and so lonely.

Yet, without being sovereign, there is no hope for the type of joy we know we ARE.

THE BLUE PILL

In the movie, The Matrix, which was about moving into the new consciousness…the protagonist was at one point offered a blue pill which would place him back into his old life, back into the matrix.  But the irony is that even if there were such a pill, who would really want to go back there?

As challenging as this process is, even at times feeling like we have had enough….even in our darkest moments we know we could never go back to being unconscious.  It would be a fate worse than death itself, which, actually, death would be a relief.

Struggle, pain and suffering are not part of the Christ Consciousness, although organized religion would tell us otherwise.  Yeshua (Jesus) really didn’t intend for his story to end up the way it did.  But doesn’t that tell you something.  Even Yeshua himself ended up getting sucked into the martyr role.

And of course christianity ran with that story and it became the basis of their teachings.  That Jesus died for our ‘sins’ and that his ultimate sacrifice was a good thing.  So the idea of love being about personal sacrifice really caught on.

Pain and suffering became part of the mix of love and service.  Yikes!!!

So here we are, going through this transformation, and many of us feeling it on such a tangible level…in our physical bodies.  Not just the typical ascension symptoms, but some really deep pain, and dis-ease.  We reach a point where we say, “I didn’t sign up for this.  There is just too much pain.”

On a human level, it begins to feel like we are being a martyr for something we are not even sure of.

But it is what it is.  And unfortunately there is no trying to push the body into its own ascension before its time.  But we are learning that this process is all about allowing, and about choosing how we want to feel.  And that allowing thing is a very high vibration.  It’s a very evolved state of consciousness. It is part of the Christ consciousness.  And it’s the secret of alchemy.

Allowing transforms energies.  It moves stuck energies, physically and emotionally.

It doesn’t mean you have to love it.  It’s not a requirement.  There is a misperception in the spiritual community that we need to love everything and everyone.  The best thing you can do for yourself and your ascension is to discard that concept.

It has created so much doubt and confusion in those who are on the accelerated path.  We ask, “If I am so evolved then why am I so frustrated, so impatient with others, so intolerant?”

“If I am so advanced, then why is my body still so stuck?  Am I not loving my body enough?  Am I still holding onto to some belief that it must be painful?”

As the human we can still think we somehow are not doing enough, are doing the wrong thing, took the wrong turn somewhere.

Or we can begin to think it’s all just a big, cosmic joke….on us.

But, really, it’s not.  As the human we are probably still trying to figure it all out.  Still trying too hard.  But it all comes down to allowing some of that joy.  And then relaxing and trusting.  (A.R.T.)

And you don’t have to be in love with it, with the parts that are uncomfortable.  Leave that up to your eternal self….the part of you that knows all is well.