As we move toward the fifth dimension, we will begin to become more and more balanced.

Remaining stuck in one of the poles of personality still gives the ego an illusion of control over our lives. However, the more we receive higher uploads, the more the old ego patterns will begin to falter. And that is the intention, because only when the ego surrenders to the inner guidance of our higher Self can we truly begin to experience our divine essence.

Right now we are getting aware of where our ego is still digging its heels in. It prefers to hold the reins, and where our higher Self starts pulling a string the ego will pull out even more to keep control of our lives. This can be very subtle, but either way it is a form of Self-sabotage! On the way to Self-Awareness, however, it will still emerge and be on our own plate.

There may be a thousand and one causes and reasons behind why you are bothering yourself on your journey to the Light. As a soul, you are on your way to self-liberation, which is to bring you right out of heaviness, out of all limitations and out of all duality. The causes of Self-sabotage lie in the past. But liberation from these vicious circles must take place in the here and now. When we break free from the lower frequency workings of the third dimension, there is more room for our divine Self!

All the experiences that have shattered your divine Self-image have been disempowering and painful. To turn at all requires a great deal of love and understanding. Simply saying "then stop working against yourself" does not work as long as you yourself are not aware of how a certain part of you is still sabotaging your path to the Light. Wanting to stop self-subversion with a hard hand always backfires. But compassionate determination can work wonders. Therefore, we are going to see in which force field this sabotaging part is stuck. Linked to it is a deformed self-image that no longer belongs to you. To put it mildly: it no longer does you justice!

Deformities come from an imbalance that was once there, first outside of you. Something or someone managed to pull you out of your divine connection, allowing you to have certain experiences in the polar force field of duality. If that imbalance has not been corrected you have carried it with you into the remainder of your life(s). You have internalized the deformity from outside, made it your own. An example: if an authoritarian or someone you held in high esteem ever told you that you were so worthless or sinful that God would be angry with you forever, you will have put on the penitential garment and may still be unconsciously walking around with it.

How can you begin to see through and free the self-saboteur? Through your higher Self you can begin to balance the polar workings of your own personality. You need the balance of the four elements that affect your personality: earth, air, water and fire. It may seem like a lot of work, but with examples it gets easier. I'm going to put everything under a magnifying glass and exaggerate the pitfalls so you can recognize it even better. It's not the whole story, but hopefully it will offer you more insight!

If your personality has too much of the earth element, you may have become heavy handed. You make everything much heavier and more dramatic than it is. You identify yourself (too) much with your material form, but quickly see all kinds of earthly problems and limitations that are not there from a higher perspective. Because you weigh heavily the burdens of life, you become frustrated. Gravity pulls you down to lower frequencies. Because it is not pleasant to be in this heaviness and you feel increasingly oppressed, you easily project to the outside world. This causes you to lapse into a perpetrator role. If you bottle everything up, the result can be gridlock, gloom, melancholy, powerlessness and apathy. To balance this, you need air!

If your personality has too much of the element air, then you have pulled yourself out of your grounding and prefer to float somewhere in the universe. You find it difficult to be in your body and the world of forms is not for you. You seek safety in a dream world and like to build air castles in which you can be completely at ease! On earth, however, you are easily pushed around and you have difficulty guarding your limits. A steady job in society costs you tremendously because you feel far too transparent, vulnerable and wobbly for the hard world of forms. Volatility and floating, fear of connections, not being able to sink your teeth into something, directionlessness, being in your head a lot and feeling like a victim ("I never wanted to be born!") can be the result. To balance this, you need earth!

If your personality has too much of the element water, you like to identify with your feeling side. You prefer to avoid obstacles in life, especially discussions. Out of self-protection you prefer to drift with other people's currents, with the result that you easily drift away from yourself, or you cling to beacons outside yourself. What you want or think is almost scary to feel, because suppose someone else disagrees? You don't put up with resistance; you prefer to swim around it. You tend to give too much, because by giving you hope to be seen and receive love! Indecision, coldness, burnout, emotional, lingering in your grief and victimization can result. To balance this, you need fire!

If your personality has too much of the element fire, you will quickly become hot-tempered. You are easily annoyed by what you think is wrong around you. You are critical and like to react outwardly. You would like to improve everything and everyone and are not afraid of heated discussions or arguments. You prefer to fight rather than flee! You easily hide inner dissatisfaction with yourself and the world behind anger and resentment. If you don't express it, it strikes inside and you can get all kinds of inflammation. But actually, behind your anger there is a lot of pain and powerlessness, and to reach it you need water.

Speak to yourself from the missing polar forces. Imagine how you would act and how you would feel in the extreme of the other pole. Sometimes you have to go all the way to the other pole to finally discover your own golden middle! Because from the "too much of one" there is always a longing in us for that other pole. If we do see it in another, we can either be annoyed by it or long for it immensely and admire the other for it. But realize: Everything is also in you, everything is attainable! From your divine essence everything can come into balance and you will be amazed at your Self!

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