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Jeshua on Solitude: Embracing the Power of Being Alone
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- Written by Pamela Kribbe
Dear friends, I am Jeshua.
I have been a carrier of the Christ energy on Earth.
I came to bring the desire for an enhanced consciousness on Earth, and you were among those who received this impulse in order to take it on and to spread it further. You belong to a group of souls who have been pioneers in many lives, forerunners of a heart-centered consciousness. You have held a light in your soul that you wanted to express, to embody in flesh and blood, and to manifest in a material reality. Feel for a moment how deeply you are inwardly connected with me and with what I came to bring forth on Earth.
This consciousness to which I wanted to bear witness is much greater than I am, and greater than the single human being I was. It was, and is, a vast field of energy. Whether you lived during my time, that of Jesus, or if you lived in the centuries surrounding my birth, it happened in those times that a new impulse was given to the Earth and you were part of that happening. In one way or another, you have experienced, in a human body, the power and the joy that the Christ energy carries within itself.
Do you remember that energy? It is an energy of hope, and it also stimulates a certain excitement within you when you feel that energy flow in your heart. It is the hope of a different and better reality that is more attuned with human nature and with the nature of all things. A reality in which there is a more balanced and joyful way of life for everyone. Where everyone can come into their own, and where everything can be more of what it innately is: a natural, harmonious way of being that does not require much effort.
This is the energy that you came to bring, and have done so in many lives. As I said previously, you were often pioneers; you broke with the existing standards, values, and ideals because you wanted to point the way to another possibility.
How is it that you are touched by that promise of a new Earth? Somewhere on your path as a soul through the cosmos, you came to a point at which you discovered much about life and yourself, and about the elements of light and the elements of darkness: power, dependency, manipulation, deception. You have known those elements from within, and there came a time in your evolution as a soul that you wanted to let go of negative energy. There was a longing in you, a desire for a more gentle, loving reality, both within and without.
You were ready to receive the impulse of the Christ energy, because the essence of the Christ energy is that a person recognize the One in the other, the equality of the other, knowing that what you are connecting with in the other is God Itself: that spark of light, of energy, that burns in all living beings. The Christ energy makes you aware that this is the truth at the center of all life. You know that through connectedness to the other, at the level of unity, is it truly possible to live from joy and creativity.
As long as there are conflicts between you and the other, and a hierarchy of authority and power structures, that unity is not valued and there is then inequality The Christ energy was therefore an attack on existing institutions and blocks of power and authority. You can imagine how that wave of energy eroded the roots of long-standing structures, ideals, standards, and values based on fear and an ambition for power. The force of the Christ energy was a direct threat to those who held fast to power, manipulation, and deceit, and often not by choice, but from a feeling of impotence. That without such a power structure based on the ego, they would be nothing or nobody.
You have been inspired by the light of the Christ energy in previous lives, as well as in your present life, and you have had to deal with the resistance you encounter. Maybe as a young child, you already felt a spark of inspiration within you. You were touched by an energy of inspired consciousness and change, and you could feel how that collided with the world around you, whose energy was still stuck in the old power structures of fear. That can be a hard blow to experience for a sensitive and vulnerable child. When your energy, your consciousness, is not accepted by the outside world, when it is not understood and recognized, then there is pain in your being and you live with the hurt that you feel.
Yet there is still that indelible desire to contribute to the birth of a new consciousness on Earth, and this desire inspires you. It is the desire of your soul to be here, right now, and to help give form to this consciousness. Honor and value that desire within yourself! You have kept that inspiration alive despite opposition and regardless of the resistance you have experienced. There is a love and a passion within your soul that wants to be heard, and you cannot resist that flow, for if you did, you would suffocate completely.
That inspired side of you is still there. However, there is also another side that feels extremely vulnerable, which causes you to even feel ashamed of that part of yourself that is different and yearns for something new, that is willing to break with existing standards and ideals. And because that hesitant side of you is still there, you now experience great restraint in truly expressing yourself on Earth with your heart and soul; for example, as a spiritual therapist, or as an artist, or whatever you do as your way to express your soul here on Earth. That holding back is there in all of you. There is a fear: “Can I truly be myself and let myself be seen?”
For a moment, feel the force of the Christ impulse in your soul, in your own life. Dare to completely align with it. Try not to respond from modesty, from making yourself small: “I don’t know if I can do that.” Allow the Christ force to come forth, because it touches you deeply or else you would not be here.
Feel what is at the core of this force. It is a powerful energy, which indeed affects existing structures and can be confrontational and throw things into confusion. But also feel the power of love in that energy. There has never been a destructive intent in that energy. It is a stream of clarity, of truth, of wanting to know and to go to the essence of the relationships between people, and between you and the world. You want to serve that energy of truth; you want to flow with it because it makes you happy to do so.
Feel what is at the core of that energy. I ask you to do that because if you want to be, and to live from, that energy, then it may be that you have to break with the usual way things are done and that you sometimes will be confrontational toward your surroundings, and that possibility makes you afraid. You have learned from the past to make yourself small, and sometimes you think: “I should not stand out; I should not make myself too special; I should not exert too much influence.” It may seem to be an act of the ego when you try to bring out what is great in you.
But to open yourself to the Christ energy is not an act of the ego, even though it means that you do break with many things when you very deliberately take your own path. And in many ways, you also stand alone. But know that doing so is the right thing for you to do. And this takes me to the next point I want to bring to your attention, that this aloneness is a part of you. It is born from the fact that you bring something new into the world because you are a pioneer and you are different. Embrace that aloneness, that loneliness, which is part of you.
You are sometimes afraid to experience that loneliness. You feel a distance between how you think, feel, and perceive, and how the persons around you react: those persons in your work environment, or in your family, or whatever the situation you are in. This feeling of being different creates the need to return to yourself, to be alone, to withdraw yourself, but it also calls up loneliness and fear in you of being separate and an outcast.
You know that you are often indecisive and vacillate about your attempts to connect with the world around you, that world in which you experience how different you are, where you feel a rejection of your unique energy, and where you do not feel at home. You then have trouble accepting your uniqueness and you are unable to embrace the aloneness that is part of accepting who you are. But that is what is being asked of you if you really want to express your soul’s inspiration here. It means taking a backward step from the surrounding social reality that is often formed by old ideas which no longer fit you.
Give complete attention to that loneliness, because you have actually experienced that feeling for a long time. It has sometimes been so oppressive that it filled you with despair, because you encountered no kindred spirits in your surroundings and the resultant sense of loneliness was then difficult to bear. See if there are still remnants of that painful loneliness that you have experienced in this life and in previous lives.
You can give form to a figure that represents that feeling of being rejected and not understood. Create an image of the part of you that has felt rejected and lonely, and it can take the form of a man, a woman, or a child. From the perspective of your feeling center, look at that person, that part of yourself. Become aware of how that person feels who carries this old burden. You know that as you experience rejection and misunderstanding from the society around you, how that kind of reaction always impacts your emotionality, your humanity. Even though, on a soul level, there may be an inner knowing that accepts that you are different and you bring something new to Earth, and it may be clear to you intellectually why you are not understood, still, there is pain inside you, maybe even despair. And that is the part of yourself with which to connect.
Perhaps there lives in you a very sad or depressed part that no longer wants to connect with the Earth. It has experienced so much rejection and repudiation that it wants to flee from this world. That part may not feel at home here and longs for another world far removed from the Earth. A world full of harmony, light, and love, in which unity is felt naturally, and where there is no need to struggle as hard as here on Earth.
Now imagine that you know that place to where that part wants to flee, that place in the heavens where everything is light and carefree. Imagine you are now in that place, and you will receive that battle-weary figure who has been lonely and misunderstood – you will receive that person in your embrace. Feel the pain of what has happened: the sadness, the feeling of being blocked, the desire to leave, the discouragement, and the feeling that all has been for nothing.
But you are free to leave that heaviness behind you, because you are not that. You are the one who can heal that heavy burden, the one who can receive that pain into itself. You are a part of Heaven on Earth, and you bring that consciousness of unity within you. Ask that pained figure in you what it needs in order to again feel at Home here, to again be happy, and to feel that it is welcome here, even with all the pain that is the result of everything you have been through.
If that pained part of yourself becomes one with you, and is allowed to be as it is and is taken up into the embrace of your loving consciousness, the heaviness begins to slowly dissipate and you begin to feel how strong you really are. And so you can accept and appreciate your being different, your being alone and your loneliness, and not as something that is wrong, but as something that is very valuable. You are able to connect to a cosmic source of inspiration that feeds and inspires you on this material level, precisely because you have a foot in both worlds, and from that inner Source, something new comes to this Earth.
Imagine for a moment that you stand as a healed and whole person with one foot in this earthly reality and the other foot just outside this reality. From this position you can connect from your crown chakra with the Source of light and inspiration, which you recognize as the energy of Home that really vitalizes you.
Know that you have need of a certain aloneness – your individual way of traveling your own path – in order to recognize that inspiration and to allow yourself to be nurtured by it. Just take a backward step from the world to feel who you are, and sense how natural it is to do that. See how taking that backward, inward step need not be a problem, because you can stay connected with this world at the same time. You always keep a certain distance from this world, yet there can also be joy in expressing who you truly are.
You can return again and again to this position, because you stand, as it were, always on the edge of earthly reality, the boundary of the two worlds. The outward step is alternated with the inward step, and by doing so you become a richer human being. In this way, you bring the new from the world within.
You come to know that the part of you that has often felt lonely or abandoned, or has felt different, can be a source of inspiration if you really understand what is going on within yourself. You come to understand that you cannot be completely of this world and that you have need of being different, because you are different. And so enjoy being alone, and cherish your solitude.
It does not mean that you have to leave earthly reality – it is actually the reverse. It is a process of descending more deeply into all that you are, and not only as an earthly person, but also as a soul, a cosmic being who is very old and wise, and one who has been here many times. You need to feel that inner dimension of the soul in order to feel inspired and to remember who you are.
Dare to enter into that aloneness, that solitude, because therein lies a great strength. By being more fully connected to that place, you can stand more powerfully, as well as more easily, in this human world. If you experience resistance, or maybe just feel uncomfortable about the reactions of the people around you, and you feel that what you say or emanate is confrontational, you can allow that – it does not affect you. You simply stay within your own energy.
Sometimes it is necessary to withdraw physically, while at other times, when you are surrounded by people and cannot withdraw, it is still about you and realizing who you are and accepting that. And then you can come and go in this world without getting drawn into it, or without getting affected by energies of rejection, or alienation, or hostility – you can allow those to be. You then know this world need not affect you, because you sense an other-worldly Source of inspiration that is deeply embedded in your soul. And so, you become independent of the reactions of others. That is the path you are traveling. Embrace your own power. Believe in it and be the pioneer that you are.
© Pamela Kribbe
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